Episode 152 - Seduce The World Through Magnetic Conversations

 
  • Episode 152 - Seduce The World With The Way You Speak

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    Hello, hello, beautiful beings, and welcome to Come to your Senses, my loves, do we have a treat for you today?

    00:52

    Because one of the most popular topics and most requested topics on this podcast is around the art of everyday seduction and making seduction less about some sort of persuasion or manipulation to get an outcome and more about the natural spark of magnetism that exudes whenever you are most embodying your authentic radiance. And one of the ways that we can practice this kind of seduction is through the way that we speak. So if you have ever encountered someone who kind of looks like one of those wind up toys of chattering teeth but in human form, who just talks endlessly and maybe takes up a lot of space in the room and in the conversation, you know those people sometimes are very dynamic, but not what I would call necessarily seductive in the sense that I don't feel drawn in to what they're sharing. I more feel like I want to push away from what they're sharing. And when I was in school for skincare and I was learning massage, one of the things that stood out to me was that, you know, each massage movement has its own craft. Where you learn the movement. But where the art comes in is with your speed and your tempo and the pressure. And my massage therapist shout out to my beloved Alexis. I call her a shamanic ballerina because as soon as she puts her hands on my body it's this immense angels singing kind of healing and it feels like she's performing swan lake on my muscles. But anyway, a person might do the exact massage movements that Alexis is doing, but without her slow, steady, intentional pressure and that feeling into what the muscle is ready to let go of instead of forcing it into trying to release. It makes all the flip indifference. And it is the same with the way that we communicate.

    03:33

    And so in today's episode, whether you are talking to a beloved, talking in a business conversation, talking to a room of thousands of people as a public speaker, today's gems are going to help you drop deeper into your own body, your own unique pace, and help the thoughts in your mind align more intentionally and more deliciously as they slip out of your mouth. So I am so excited to dive into today's gems, and one announcement that I wanna make is that next week, I am gonna be sharing something with you that I have been working on for four blessed years and that I need your help with to move into the final phases, and so stay tuned, and I'm so excited to invite you into this creation. And with that, let's now dive into our gems. And so where we'll begin is with a paragraph from Sacred Seduction, and this is stories from the Seduction Council. So when I first started my career, I would teach classes in seduction, and I had a group of participants that I really watched blossom and just transform in their process of becoming more embodied in their practice of seduction and less limited by their understanding of the full range of seduction, and one of them was Eliza, and so I'm gonna read this paragraph to you that Eliza contributed to my book on the meaning of seduction.

    05:47

    Seduction is intuition allowed to bloom and sparkle. It is all the senses, including the sixth, in charge of one's decisions, feelings and actions, allowing the heart to lead and the mind to follow. It is decidedly feminine, extremely powerful, very vulnerable and completely intoxicating to experience. Under Kitty's tutelage, I have realized how important, empowering and definitive it is to allow oneself to be immersed in the sacredness of the act of seduction. Ooh la la. Thank you so much, eliza, mother, stepmother to be conjurer, and lingerie enthusiast from her description in the book. And so when we speak like I love so much about that description is allowing the heart to lead and the mind to follow. And I also love Eliza's use of the word vulnerable. And that is our first gem, which is there is such attractiveness when we speak the truth.

    07:14

    One of my clients once asked in a group coaching circle Mary, how do we know when we have given our verite? Because I used to have another program called Verite. That was all about connecting with your truth and speaking your truth and living your truth. And Verite means truth in French. And I said well, you know, you have really tapped into and given your verite when you taste the vomit rising from your stomach because it's such a tender and vulnerable truth. And of course you know that's not necessarily the requirement, nor is that necessarily the goal. The goal is to feel more comfortable and more adept and more flowing in expressing our truth.

    08:07

    But this first gem is about the seductiveness of sharing what's real. I was on a date recently and the person sitting across from me was kind of nervous and was talking a lot, telling a lot of stories and just kind of giving me a lot of information. And I asked them hey, what's something you're afraid of right now, like right now in this moment or right now in your life? And that was the moment where I was like, okay, I would go on a second date with this person, the way that this person answered the question, because it dropped us out of the head and into the heart and there is just something so alluring about a person answering a question from those deeper parts of themselves and not just delivering the froth of the conscious mind. So that is our first gem is that what is real is incredibly seductive.

    09:16

    The second gem is actually a technique that I call turning the page. So when we read books, you know there's a reason that we typically don't see books delivered on scrolls anymore, these long pieces of parchment, because there is a digestibility when you turn the page of a story, this little nanosecond, where your consciousness gets to take in a visual of new words, chew and swallow what you've already read and open up to this new dose of information. Otherwise, I've actually put the setting on my Kindle to this just scrolling feature, scrolling through an entire book, and it's exhausting to be faced with all of that information at once. And similarly, in the way that we speak, allowing for intentional pauses between the words gives the listener the opportunity to chew and digest before taking in more information. And what you'll notice is that the slower you speak, the more they will hear, which is kind of a paradox, because when we really want to be heard, typically our body will start to fuel us with adrenaline and got to say the right thing and got to make it perfect.

    10:59

    And I invite you the next time you might find yourself in a situation like that, or just in a situation where you want to draw that person closer or allow them to hear you more closely is, between your words, allow for a bit of a sacred pause, and this, too, may feel a little exposing, because you might have to reveal the fact that you don't know every single secret of the universe all at once, which might make you feel a little vulnerable in a conversation and often when I'm speaking, delivering a class to clients or speaking on like being a guest on a podcast, I'll say you know what? I need to pause, my mind just started going faster than my mouth can keep up with and I'm just spewing words at yet and I don't want to do that, and I'll put a hand on my heart and I'll take a breath and I'll just give myself a chance to reset. And every time I do that, the feedback is God. I got so much from that, like the permission to actually slow down and be with our bodies, even when we're in this position of having to deliver information. It's like it gives us all permission to slow down and every time we slow down, we open up that opportunity for the real to be heard and seen and potentially delivered through our speech.

    12:42

    And our final gem is sensualizing your language. So I invite you to hear these words that I'm about to share with you and notice the sensations that they carry with them the lup-shoes, luxurious, galvanizing One of my favorites, plump. I don't know why I just love that word so much Plump, magnificent, splendid, fervid, supple, rasmutaz. So these are just some words that I believe contain a little extra sparkle. And that sparkle comes in the form of a feeling. You know, when I say lup-shoes, I don't just say lup-shoes, you know, it's not like candy bar that just kind of comes out in a quick burst, it's like the lup-shoes, oh God, the pressure against your teeth of the vuh and the looping swirl of the lup and the shois, the soft, fuzzy curves of the shois. I mean, what more do we need in life, honestly, than tantalizing language? You know, these types of words draw you in and create a hypnotic spell that gets cast over the listener because it invites them into their own experience of the shois. So these, my friends, are your gems on the art of seducing yourself and others through your speech.

    14:58

    And if you enjoyed this episode, the book Sacred Seduction by Kitty Cavalier is available on Amazon and it is just loaded from top to bottom with gorgeous, sparkling, glittering gems of all different colors and flavors on this art of making seduction a spiritual practice of embodiment, sensuality and authenticity. And as I said at the start of the episode, I'm jumping up and down a little bit in my seat, excited to share next week something really exciting that I just can't wait to blow the champagne cork on and, as always, I would be so honored and delighted to hear from you in a review on iTunes or to receive some love sent my way through a five star button on Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts. Those tiny gestures really do help land this podcast into more eardrums that want it and can benefit from it. So I appreciate your partnership and support in making that happen, and thank you so much for being a part of the Come to your Senses community. I will see you in our next episode

Transform your dialogue skills into an irresistible dance of words and emotions. Today's gems will teach you how to pace your conversations as masterfully as a massage therapist charts the course of relaxation through your muscles. Not just pillow talk; these strategies apply to commanding a boardroom or captivating an audience.

Stay tuned for a tantalizing sneak peek into a project that has been brewing behind the scenes for four years, poised to flourish with contribution!

Links from the show:
Sacred Seduction book by Kitty Cavalier (Mary's old pen name) 


 
 
 

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Episode 153 - The Next Chapter of Come To Your Senses

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Episode 151 - The Courage To Be Yourself